Here in Haiti there are many people that touch my life…there are many people who God uses to refine me, challenge me and grow me…2 year old Gabriel that I wrote about in my previous post is definitely one of those people…
This is the only picture I took of him, mostly because my hands were full carrying him or caring for him all the time, and even here it’s a lopsided picture because he’s in the midst of a nervous, uncomfortable crying fit.
Comforting precious Gabriel was so challenging…trying to love a child that has never been loved…or has been loved for a few days by different people but then left, was so difficult. My heart was so pained by seeing how he comforted himself by laying prostrate on the floor, and how confused he was by a soft touch. I prayed to feel his pain and his fear…(and so thankful for much of the time no one but my amazing friend Bek was around)…because from then on when Gabriel cried out of fear and pain (he was so sick)…I was crying right next to him.
The day I returned him to the orphanage seemed like an eternity…before making the decision to bring him back, I made my very patient and loving friend Tex pull the car over 3 separate times…not because I didn’t know what to do…but because I was struggling with what I knew I had to do (to be safe and legal in this country)…and between what my heart so badly wanted to do…as I dropped Gabriel back off at the orphanage still sick, I turned around and crumbled before I even made it in the car.
As my friend Tex dropped me off in Gressier…I walked from my school to my house thankful I had my sunglasses on because tears were streaming down my face…as I continued to walk there was an elderly lady in front of me who I had never seen before, she turned around, politely said “Bonjou” and continued walking in front of me…I mumbled Bonjou back and walked slow enough that I wouldn’t have to walk near her because I did not want to have any conversation with her (or anyone) at all…as we both walked I was so consumed with my anger, tears and sadness that I didn’t notice her soothing singing for a few minutes…after a bit I heard her voice but was crying so loudly I couldn’t hear her words….as I gasped for air, there was a pause in my breath and I heard her say, “Jesus.”…(in English)…no one in Gressier speaks English, and it’s even less likely that an elderly lady would speak English…so my ears perked up to her song…she continued in a mix of Creole and English…”Jezi, Jezi, Mwen renmen ou (I love you)…Jesus, I adore you…Jezi, Jezi.”
As she kept walking, my heavy heart seemed to lighten and my tears stopped flowing…I listened to her beautiful, soothing voice…and was puzzled by her English, but comforted by her singing…before I knew it I had stopped crying and was walking yet resting for the first time in days…after a few more minutes she veered up a path to a house, turned around and in another strange mix of English and Creole…told me Thank You and said Good Bye…Confused by her “Thank You.” I thanked her for singing, and she just smiled and walked up the path.
“Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.” Hebrews 13:2
As I continued walking to my house, I thanked God for sending this dear lady to comfort me and began to ask God why He sent Gabriel…why did I make that split second decision to take a second look in the orphanage and see him sitting alone on the step?…why did I then feel God prompting me to take him home to care for him for a few days?…I began racking my brain about Gabriel in the bible and was so blessed by what I found…
Gabriel was an angel and messenger from God…his name means, strong man of God…hero of God…and God is my strength and courage…reading that alone put my heart at peace and I began praying for my precious Gabriel to KNOW the truth of HIS name…
As I continued to look for Gabriel in the bible, I ran across Luke and read the words that Gabriel spoke when he was delivering messages from God….
He so boldly and strongly states in Luke twice…“Do not be afraid…” first to Zechariah (telling him about the future birth of John the Baptist) and second to Mary (telling her about the future birth of Jesus)…the angel Gabriel was sent to deliver a message but knew he would be met by fear and concern, so he prefaced his encounters by asking them both not to be afraid…when he was talking to Zechariah he says, “I am Gabriel. I stand in the presence of God, and I was sent to speak to you and to bring you this good news…”
Gabriel’s message to Zechariah and Mary was “unbelievable” to them…Zechariah and his wife were “advanced in years”…and Mary was a virgin…
However, Zechariah and Mary’s faith in the message of God sent through the Angel Gabriel is a beautiful picture of faith and trust.
Gabriel’s words of wisdom and encouraging message from God is beautiful…The last sentence that the angel Gabriel says in Luke is what I have been holding on to for these last couple of days and is something that is now powerfully engrained in my mind, with Mary’s hesitation with what he just told her, he looks at her and states, “For nothing will be impossible with God.”
“For nothing will be impossible with God.”
Please KNOW that you are not forgotten, please KNOW that you are being prayed for, thought about and loved even at this moment. Please FEEL the angels surrounding and protecting you…
Lord, watch over this dear baby as I know you already are…comfort him with your Spirit and your Love…help him to know that He is never alone, that you are with him wherever he goes…
Jesus, give me peace about what is happening now…give me patience for what is to come…give me strength for trying to understand why everything has happened this way and please help me to remember that YOU already know what is next for both of us.
God, let me grow through your lessons…strengthen my faith in your goodness…and help me to continue to be inspired by your Word…help me to Love Gabriel best, even from afar…
For Nothing is Impossible with You.
2 thoughts on “The Angel Gabriel”
My heart hurts as I read, but Megs just know that you have people praying for you and for your children…I love that you call them all yours and I know that is truly how you see them. My heart hurts that I’m not there, that I can’t be there, but I can LOVE, PRAY, and HOPE for you and your children. I love you, am inspired and encouraged by you, and I’m praying for you.
After coming upon your last post I have not been able to stop revisiting it and have been praying for the children at the orphanage that you referenced. I’ve been writing to a little girl there named Magdala, whom I pray for regularly, for the past year. Now I know another name and face (thanks for the picture of Gabriel); this will help me as I pray.
I don’t know if you are familiar with the author and preacher Francis Chan, but in a recent sermon he gave to his former congregation he stated that his focus for them would be to pray for them that they truly become aware of the magnitude of God’s love for them as Paul talk’s about in Ephesians 3: 14-19. I think he is struggling with leaving but knows that it was something he had to do. In that struggle he was driven to his knees.
In your struggle (having to leave Gabriel) you were driven to your knees. And it is there that God lifted you up.
Right now I would love to get on a plane and fly to P-A-P and spend the rest of my life loving these seemingly forgotten children. But due to my current situation I cannot. So I struggle with my limitations and then remember that it’s not about me and get on my knees and pray for them and ask God to let Gabriel, Magdala and all the children there know the height and depth of His love.
Thank you Megan for sharing your brokeness and your hope.